Can I Have the Best of Both Worlds?

The “Big Questions” series at church has been excellent, and the question “Can I Have the Best of Both Worlds” was incredibly thought provoking. It was heavy, it was excellent, it was true.  The answer to “can I have the best of both worlds” is no. We can not have the best of both worlds. We have to choose.

I don’t know about you, but I am in a constant wrestling match with that truth. My western mind set is way too focused on the material world. I have weight to lose because of the over-abundance of food that surrounds me; I have to buy new hangers because my closet is full; every few months I take bags of items to the Rescue Mission to donate, and still have way too much.

Twice in my adult life, I have gotten rid of almost all of my worldly possessions, the first time was when we moved overseas to be missionaries, and the second time was when we moved back. There was something so freeing about being rid of all the stuff. It really felt good. However, in both places, I managed to fill my house with stuff. Why?

And then, John’s point about sin being fun. We are drawn to it because it is enticing. Something about it appeals to us or we wouldn’t be tempted. I’m not tempted by things that don’t appeal to me, but other things can really draw me in. And, as is always the case, the end result is regret, or worse–captivity.

When I look at the “more stuff” trap, or the “sin” trap, or the “control” trap or the “safety” trap  it becomes apparent to me that in all of these situations I am trying to bless myself and/or meet my own needs. I am trying to be my own god.  And what is really true, I have no control of anything, but I can certainly live in the deception that I think I do.

Contrast that way of life with the other world–the Kingdom of Heaven world in which the One True God is King and it looks completely different.

Jesus tells us in Matthew 16  “If any of  you wants to be my follower, you must give up your own way, take up your cross, and follow me.  If you try to hang on to your life, you will lose it. But if you give up your life for my sake, you will save it. And what do you benefit if you gain the whole world but lose your own soul?”

And in Matthew 6 verses 19-33 Jesus tells us not to worry about what we’re going to wear, what we’re going to eat–he reminds us that the stuff of this world is temporary, it rusts, it gets destroyed–he reminds us that our Father knows what we need and He will provide as we seek His Kingdom first.

In John 16:33 Jesus tells us that in this world we will have trouble, but not to be dismayed because he has overcome the world. And he is pretty frank about the fact that we will suffer for his name’s sake.  All of this is only temporary as well, yet  it is a temporary that is worth something for eternity.

In addition, Jesus also tells us that only in him do we have life (John 14:6), only in Him is that life abundant (John 10:10) only in him do we have the fruit of the Spirit (love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, gentleness, faithfulness, and self control), only in him do our lives have purpose and meaning, only in him will we be able to bear fruit that will last (John 15:16), and only in him are we freed from the smallness of living for self.

I loved the list that John ended his sermon with–it went something like this:

There is only One who is our refuge, only One who comes toward us when everyone else is moving away, only One who saves us, only One who will not condemn, only One who transforms our lives, only One who gives us life eternal, only One who fills us with purpose, only One who is trustworthy, only One who is constant, only One who is always present, only One whose name is Love. He is where true life is found.

And what’s true is that I have experienced this. I know that it is true, and that nothing in this world compares. I know that simple living and simply following Jesus is freeing and fulfilling. Yet still I wrestle. Ugh! Thank you, Paul, for letting me know in Romans 7:24 that you struggled too: “Oh, what a miserable person I am! Who will free me from this life that is dominated by sin…  Thank God! The answer is in Jesus Christ our Lord.”

So, where does this bring me? I find myself again facing the challenge that Joshua laid out before the Israelites:

..Fear the Lord and serve him wholeheartedly. Put away forever the idols your ancestors worshiped… Serve the Lord alone. 15 But if you refuse to serve the Lord, then choose today whom you will serve. Would you prefer the gods your ancestors served? Or will it be the gods of the Amorites in whose land you now live? But as for me and my family, we will serve the Lord.” (Joshua 24:14-15 NLT)

Will I serve the false, lying gods of self, of selfishness, self preservation, self protection, of stuff, of trying to control my own life, my own destiny…or will I choose total surrender to His way? I can’t have both. Either He is God, or I am god. Today, I repent of how out of balance I have become and am making the choice to choose Him, His kingdom,  and His ways again.  I feel some purging coming on….

How about you? Is this a struggle for you as well? If it is not a struggle for you, how do you maintain proper perspective and balance in this materialistic, self-sufficient society of ours?

–Luanne

I wish I didn’t share this struggle. It would be lovely to be able to say that I have great perspective and balance and that the temptation to live with one foot in each world is not a problem I can relate to. But the truth is, this is an ongoing wrestling match in my life. Luanne wrote,

“Will I serve the false, lying gods of self, of selfishness, self preservation, self protection, of stuff, of trying to control my own life, my own destiny…or will I choose total surrender to His way?”

I want to always choose surrender to His way. I know what happens when I choose otherwise. Yet, I find myself choosing myself over and over again. Why?? Because these false gods whisper lies that sound like promises. These “promises” speak to the places in me that long for fairness. For safety. For stability. The places that are afraid of change, tired of grieving and desperate for control.

These “promises” are skillfully worded to hit each of us where we are the most vulnerable, the most desperate. And, unfortunately, sometimes I buy it. I believe the hissing lies and I white-knuckle them. I hang on until, inevitably, the lies are exposed as such and I’m left disappointed, brokenhearted and, again, asking why.

John talked about one lie that targets our desire for fairness, the one that says if we follow God, if we do what He asks, if we’re good, we’ll be “healthy, wealthy and wise”. And he also identified that we all know that isn’t true. We all know someone whose story defies this lie. Friends who love Jesus-and are battling cancer. Family members who have done everything right-and find themselves in a state of financial ruin. For me, I think of my mama. She lived her life for her kids, for others, most of all for Jesus-and she died of a terrible disease in her mid-fifties.

So what do we do with all of that? John asked us these questions regarding the unfairness of life:

“Where can you run? When it’s you? When it’s someone you love? Who will be with you then? Who will be your refuge?

And as I pondered his words, these words came to mind:

“Where can I go from your Spirit? Where can I flee from your presence? If I go up to the heavens, you are there; if I make my bed in the depths, you are there. If I rise on the wings of the dawn, if I settle on the far side of the sea, even there your hand will guide me, your right hand will hold me fast.”  Psalm 139:7-10

When the promises this world makes are exposed, when we find ourselves trapped in a cage built by our own hands, when we experience the unfairness and instability of our ever-changing world and we find ourselves all alone… He is there. Not to shame us for being so stupid, not to mock our lack of self-control, not to condemn us for foolishly running after idols. No. He is there to remind us that there is nowhere we can go that He won’t find us. Nowhere too dark that He won’t stoop low to meet us. As John said, Jesus is the only one who wants to be a part of our world when it’s unfair, unsafe and fading away, when our dreams and hopes are dying. He’s the one who will wait for us, walk with us, stay with us. In Hebrews 13:5, we are reminded of His promise to be with us:

Let your character [your moral essence, your inner nature] be free from the love of money [shun greed—be financially ethical], being content with what you have; for He has said, “I will never [under any circumstances] desert you [nor give you up nor leave you without support, nor will I in any degree leave you helpless], nor will I forsake or let you down or relax My hold on you [assuredly not]!” (AMP Bible)

Can we have the best of both worlds? No. We can’t serve both God and ourselves. Will life be hard? Yes. Whether we do it God’s way or our way, we are guaranteed that life will sometimes be unfair and unsafe and we will have trouble. But we have a God who says He will never, under any circumstances leave us or relax His grip on us. Even when we fail. Even when we buy the lies and find ourselves in a pit we created. Even there, in our brokenness, His hand will guide us and hold us fast. I am so grateful for His promise of “withness”. And I know that as I continue to find Him faithful and as I trust Him to lead me, my grip on the things of this world will loosen more and more each day.

Where do you run when life turns out to be unfair and unsafe? What do you cling to for stability, for control? Do the promises in the verses from Psalm 139 and Hebrews 13:5 comfort your heart? We would love to read your thoughts and questions!

–Laura

corrie ten boom

How Do You Know What Love Is?

I thought I knew love…but I didn’t.

This weekend’s message began with these words. And my head nodded a silent “Me, too”. As John shared parts of his story, details of my own swirled in my mind. Along with a few familiar lines…

                        “What is love? Baby, don’t hurt me, don’t hurt me no more…”                                                      “I wanna know what love is…I want you to show me…”

These aren’t the usual songs that run through my head during church. It was a little distracting, because once the tunes started, it was hard to turn them off. But, as I did my best to not break out into 80’s rock ballad glory, I did think about how many songs have been written that relate to the question of the day,

How do you know what love is?

In a culture where we use the same word to describe our affinity for chocolate, our favorite jeans, our spouses and God, how do we begin to define what “love” actually is?

I was told “God is love” from a very young age. But what I saw and heard and felt from people who “loved” God didn’t seem very loving. And the God that was presented to me as a child wasn’t nearly as lovable as my favorite dessert. I sang “Jesus Loves Me” countless times. People I trusted told me God loved me, but the religious system I grew up in emphasized a big IF. I believed a lie as a toddler that grew deep roots all the way into my twenties.

God loves me IF I’m good enough

But “good enough” is a moving target, isn’t it? I began to strive for perfection as a little girl–not only for God’s approval and love, but for everyone’s. I had bought the lie that had been modeled for me. One of John’s points in this weekend’s message was,

I thought I had to earn love…I don’t.

Believing the lie that I had to earn love wrote every page of my life story until God Himself took over control of the pen. I say “took over control”, but it wasn’t a hostile takeover. He didn’t get sick of me, sigh in exasperation and grab the pen from my hand. He only took over control when I released my grip and handed it over to Him. And that didn’t happen because He was persuasive, manipulative or domineering. He didn’t scare me into giving Him control. He loved me in the ways John put before us this weekend. He came for me the same way He instructed Hosea to go after Gomer (Hosea 3:1), the same way He went after His rebellious Israelite children (Hosea 11:1-4). I was the prostitute chasing other lovers, looking for approval and searching for love all the wrong ways and in all the wrong places. And He came for me not with judgement, not with condemnation, not even with a scolding tone. He came for me in subtleties. He didn’t chase me, He wooed me. He didn’t demand control of my life-He did request it. He didn’t shout, he whispered. He pursued my wandering heart this way until I realized that I had always been chosen by Him-and I now had the choice to choose Him in return.  In the middle of the mess I had created with my life, He came for me.

In the middle of our mess, we need the message of the Messiah.

Not the message of “pray this prayer so you don’t go to hell”. Not the message of “clean up your life and then you’ll be acceptable”. Not the message of “try a little harder, do a little more”, or any of the other lies that have been embedded in our hearts. No, the message of the Messiah is a message of hope, grace, forgiveness, redemption and love. Real love. The love we’re aching for, even if we don’t know it yet. The love that Ephesians 2:4-6 so beautifully illustrates. I love the way it’s written in the the Amplified Bible:

“But God-so rich is He in His mercy! Because of and in order to satisfy the great and wonderful and intense love with which He loved us; Even when we were dead (slain) by [our own] shortcomings and trespasses, He made us alive together in fellowship and in union with Christ; [He gave us the very life of Christ Himself, the same new life with which He quickened Him, for] it is by grace (His favor and mercy which you did not deserve) that you are saved (delivered from judgment and made partakers of Christ’s salvation). And He raised us up together with Him and made us sit down together [giving us joint seating with Him] in the heavenly sphere [by virtue of our being] in Christ Jesus (the Messiah, the Anointed One).

Because of and in order to satisfy His great, wonderful, intense love for me… even while I was dead, before I could choose anything for myself (because dead people don’t have choices), He gave me the same resurrecting life that raised Jesus from the dead. He came for me. And even after I received the life He offered (and really, the offer is to exchange death for life-my bad for His good-so why in the world do any of us wait to engage in that transaction???), He came for me. And He comes still. Because Love wants me to experience the fullest life-not only salvation from death. Love is stronger than my doubts, my fears, my unfaithfulness. Love rescues me from myself. Love rescues me from my enemies. Love is patient, kind, long-suffering.

The reason love is so strong is because love isn’t a thing that it is contingent or dependent on me, on us, on anything we can do. Love is found in the scars of Jesus. Scars that remain on a body that was willing to call us friends while we were still enemies, that sought us while we were strangers. A body that saw a beloved bride while she was still in the brothel. A body that was given in order to satisfy the love of a Father for all of His children.

How do I know what love is? I lean into the heart that has pursued mine since before He formed it. I meet love in the person of Jesus. I don’t believe I’ll “know” it fully until I’m forever in the presence of Love, Himself. Because this love, it’s too big to grasp. And that is okay with me. Because I didn’t come to the understanding of love that I have today all at once. It has taken time and patience and the relentless pursuit of a God that will never stop revealing His heart to me. My whole life is a love story being written moment by moment. I hope I’ll know more of His love tomorrow than I do today. That’s the beauty of relationship–it grows over time. And the journey is a passionate adventure of being pursued by a love that will not let me go.

How do you know what love is? Do you? What keeps you from knowing God’s love for you?

–Laura

I love what Laura wrote, her vulnerability, her personal story, and will reiterate many of her points, but in a different way.

“I Want to Know What Love Is” by the band Foreigner was also going through my head, and I couldn’t shake it after church, so I went looking for what I could find.  For those unfamiliar with the song, or needing a refresher, some of the lyrics are:

I gotta take a little time, a little time to think things over.  I better read between the lines, in case I need it when I’m older. Now this mountain I must climb, feels like a world upon my shoulders. Through the clouds I see love shine. It keeps me warm as life grows colder. In my life, there’s been heartache and pain, I don’t know if I can face it again. Can’t stop now, I’ve traveled so far, to change this lonely life.

I wanna know what love is, I want you to show me. I wanna feel what love is. I know you can show me.

I’m gonna take a little time, a little time to look around me. I’ve got nowhere left to hide, it looks like love has finally found me…

This song, written by Mick Jones and Lou Gramm in 1984,  hit the #1 spot in the UK, the USA, Australia, topped charts in South Africa, Switzerland, Canada, Ireland, New Zealand, Norway, Sweden, was in the top 25 on Contemporary recurrent charts in 2000, 2001, and 2002, and is on Rolling Stone Magazine’s list of one of the greatest songs of all time. Why?

The song mentions a “you”, but it is definitely not a typical “love” song. It is a plea. It is a journey. It is a search for real love.  I don’t even know if the writer knows who the “you” is that he’s crying out to. In my view, it could very easily be a prayer-the desperate cry of someone who is lost, who is lonely, who knows that love exists but doesn’t know how to access it. It could be you. It has been me.   I believe that we are all created with a deep hunger to know what love is, and John beautifully pointed out in his sermon that Love is a person. Love of objects, love of only the physical realm will always fall short. But the Love of God–nothing compares. Even as I typed that last sentence, I went back and capitalized the word “Love”–the Love of God is Jesus.  God demonstrates His love for us through Jesus.

When John was making the point that God’s love is not weak, that it is powerful–I was struck by a phrase in the scripture 2 Corinthians 5:14-15  For Christ’s love compels us, because we are convinced that one died for all, and therefore all died.  And he died for all, that those who live should no longer live for themselves but for him who died for them and was raised again.”

A quick glance at that scripture would lead us to believe that Paul is saying that every person with breath in their lungs and a beating heart should be compelled to live for God. However, the wording of the phrase that those who live should no longer live for themselves” gives the verse another layer.

Ephesians 2:1-6 that Laura highlighted above reminds us that we were all dead. It reads like this in the NLT:

Once you were dead because of your disobedience and your many sins. You used to live in sin, just like the rest of the world, obeying the devil—the commander of the powers in the unseen world. He is the spirit at work in the hearts of those who refuse to obey God.  All of us used to live that way, following the passionate desires and inclinations of our sinful nature. By our very nature we were subject to God’s anger, just like everyone else. But God is so rich in mercy, and he loved us so much, that even though we were dead because of our sins, he gave us life when he raised Christ from the dead. (It is only by God’s grace that you have been saved!)  For he raised us from the dead along with Christ and seated us with him in the heavenly realms because we are united with Christ Jesus.”

In the 2nd Corinthians passage, Paul is saying–those of you who are now alive because you have a relationship with Christ, those of you who have experienced His love in a personal way, will now be unablebecause of that powerful love- to live the way you did before. His LOVE–He, Jesus, through the power of His Holy Spirit will compel you to live for Him and join Him in His mission to take His love to everyone.  Every person on the face of the planet is already loved by God; however, they don’t all have relationship with God, they are not yet alive, but they don’t know it. They do not know that they are loved. They do not know what real love is.  And we do. And we used to be just like them–dead–and now we’re alive…

So what do we do– how do we show them? First, we have to have received God’s love ourselves. Do you know that you are truly, completely, totally, loved by God? Do you know that He proved that love for you by sending Jesus to take the condemnation that your sins deserved so that you don’t ever have to be condemned, and so that you can live in freedom, no guilt, live with incredible purpose, and live full of the fruit of the Holy Spirit which is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, gentleness, goodness, faithfulness, and self-control. Do you know in the core of your being, not just in your head, that you are loved? I hope so, because it’s true, and it is the starting point and the fuel for an ongoing adventure with God and the abundant life that Jesus promises. It’s that love that makes us hunger to spend time with God, it’s that love that opens our eyes to the needs of others around us, it’s that love that changes and transforms our lives, it’s that love that makes us fall in love with Him in return, it’s that love that keeps us out of duty bound religion and living in a more beautiful relationship than we ever thought possible. Have you received, embraced, accepted His love? Is that the place from which you live? I remember after my season of self-destruction, that in my return to God I thought I would always be a second class citizen in the Kingdom because I had screwed up so badly. I thought that He would never really be able to, or want to use me. That’s a lie. And when I finally began to embrace the truth of how incredible His love is, how all encompassing His love is, how powerful His love is, how forgiving His love is,  and let that sink in–it changed me forever; it is still changing me. Knowing -in the intimate sense- His love– that’s first.

Second, we love the world the way that we are loved by God–gently, subtly, by wooing through acts of kindness and care rather than chasing; by requesting and inviting rather than demanding and placing expectations and obligations upon others; by whispering rather than shouting, by choosing to love rather than making people earn it; and by showing the power and strength of the love of God by being willing to share our stories and show our scars, just like Jesus did– remembering that our scars are evidence that a Healer exists.

Many are crying out– “I want to know what love is, I want you to show me.”  

If you are the one crying out, I want to show you!  God, through His love has changed my life! If you are not the one crying out, are you willing to be the “you”?  Are you willing to share your story, show your scars, and be an instrument of love in the hands of the LOVE of God? Have you already had opportunity to do that? We’d love to hear your story!

-Luanne

cross equals loveFor-I-am-Convinced

More thoughts on prayer…

The mysteries of prayer…and there are many…. can boggle my mind. At a conference a few years ago, I was introduced to this quote by Blaise Pascal: “God instituted prayer in order to lend His creatures the dignity of causality.” For whatever reason, God, in His incredible wisdom and grace allows us to connect in a deeply personal way with Him through prayer. He not only allows it, He desires it—and then the craziest thing of all– He moves, He acts through our prayers. That fact alone is mind boggling. So, when I think through this series of Big Questions, and ponder Beau’s sermon on prayer, the seemingly unanswered ones, and the answered ones, it brings me to the mystery all over again.

Beau highlighted, and I agree wholeheartedly, that prayer has very little to do with the actual words we say; it is more about our heart condition; it is about connecting with God; it is about bringing everything in our lives to the God of the universe who is also our intimate loving Father; it is about conversing with Him. He loves to hear about our victories, our defeats, our concerns for others, our love for the world, our desire to see Him move in mighty ways and make His name known, and He loves for us to be still in His presence and hear from Him, rest in Him, and trust Him.

Confession: I used to stress out over prayer. I knew its importance and was afraid that I would mess it up somehow. To be asked to pray out loud was horrifying. I was sure that I wasn’t doing it well enough. I read books on prayer, went to seminars on prayer, tried various formulas, various outlines, various methods, and eventually came to the conclusion that the only way I can mess up prayer is not to pray. God is absolutely not after formulas and polished phrases. He is truly after connection with us–me bringing all of myself to Him. You bringing all of yourself to Him.

Jesus gave us a beautiful example of what kinds of elements to include in our prayer lives when He taught us to “pray in the manner of” The Lord’s Prayer– elements that include greeting our Father, lifting Him up, praying for the things of His kingdom, and for His will to be done, asking for personal provision, for the grace to forgive others, for deliverance from temptation, for protection from the evil one, and acknowledging His greatness and authority over all. These are good things to include, AND I believe that God is just as interested in a quick sentence prayer in the middle of the day, or a “wow” prayer when He blows our minds with something beautiful, or a heart broken “why” prayer when hard things come our way–. Prayer is all about connection. Period.

So, maybe our biggest challenge in prayer is trusting God completely with however He chooses to move. Nowhere in scripture does God promise to give us everything we want. Nowhere in scripture does God say that He is obligated to us and our will. What He does say is “pray always and never lose heart” (Luke 18:1) and “pray without ceasing” (1 Thess. 5:17). He tells us that He hears our prayers (Ps. 66:19), that they are before His throne (Rev. 8:4) and that they are powerful and effective (James 5:16). God delights in us coming to Him with our hearts and our desires, but He is not a genie in a bottle. We know from the story of Job that God heard Job’s prayers for deliverance, yet God was doing a greater work than Job could see. God used Job’s season of suffering to give Job a new perspective on who God is–the end result of Job’s story is that Job experienced God in an incredible way. Job says in chapter 42 verse 5, “My ears had heard of You, but now my eyes have seen You.” Job experienced a new level of intimacy with the Lord through his season of suffering and his prayer relationship with God during that season.

I have had a season where I responded to what God was allowing in my life in a similar way to Job. At first I wanted a way out, an escape. God said no. Then I asked God to take my life. He said no. I was going to have to go through that season. God was with me through it all. I am on the other side of that season now, with a deep, deep reverence and deeper love for God than I knew was possible. He stripped me of my false idols and taught me that He truly is enough. He is more than enough. He handled all of my questions, all of my rants, all of my despair, and loved me ferociously in the midst of the swirling chaos. I could not see where I would end up. I was devastated and terrified, and I knew that there was nowhere to turn except for to God. He met me in the pit and did abundantly more than I could have asked or imagined.

Coming to God as if He is a genie in a bottle, there to give us whatever we pray for, is not the goal and will lead to much disappointment. Prayer is about honesty before God, about connection with God, about walking with God, trusting God and ultimately experiencing God in every circumstance and season of life, no matter how He chooses to move. He is the artist weaving the tapestry. He alone knows what we truly need. He knows the beautiful work that He is doing. He can be trusted. His view is eternal. His ways are higher. And His heart is full of love toward us. Always. To connect with Him in prayer is one of the greatest gifts He has given us. It is our spiritual lifeline. We will wither without it. And, He changes us, and the world as we enter in with Him.

How has God met you in prayer? What does your prayer life look like? I’d love to learn from you.

–Luanne

Luanne wrote, “To connect with Him in prayer is one of the greatest gifts He has given us”. I agree with that statement completely. Prayer is not a duty, a means to an end or something to cross off my to-do list. It is a gift. God already sees the end from the beginning. He knows what we need and want before we ask. He knows how He intends to answer every prayer before we pray it. And yet, He invites us to talk to Him-anytime, anyplace, about everything. I can’t imagine the cacophony that fills His ears at any given moment… It has to be loud. But He desires to hear from us. He didn’t have to give us the gift of communication with Him. But, because “He has also set eternity in the human heart” (Ecclesiastes 3:11b), He made a way for the eternal part of us-our spirits-to connect to that which we long for.

I recently read this quote from Brother Lawrence,

“There is not in the world a kind of life more sweet and delightful than that of a continual conversation with God”.

I would offer that what we say in this continual conversation is not always sweet and delightful. In fact, an honest prayer life will always include questions, lament, sorrow, pleading… sometimes even yelling and, often (in my case) ugly crying. But a life of continual conversation with God, regardless of circumstances, is sweet. And it is delightful. Because it is the way we connect the earthly and eternal. The way we can pass through the separating veil during our time on earth.

Beau highlighted Hebrews 13:14 in his sermon: “For this world is not our permanent home; we are looking forward to a home yet to come.”

I am currently participating in a study that focuses on different disciplines that draw us closer to Jesus. The first discipline we studied was prayer. In that study, I read this:

“You feel the ache at the most unexpected moments… It’s the ache of a memory, planted deep in our souls, of a different world-a better, holier, happier world where no illness strikes, no tear falls and death is but an old recollection. It is eternity lodged in each human heart. It is the deep, unquenchable homesickness for God.”

That ache is what reminds us that there is more. That the storms and trials of this life are, indeed, temporary. Beau reminded us of Jesus’ words from John 16:33,

“Here on earth you will have many trials and sorrows. But take heart, because I have overcome the world!”

Jesus overcame the world so that this world would not be the end of our stories. So that we could say, “This world is not my home”, knowing that the ache within us will one day be forever satisfied.

The ache that proves that God really did “set eternity in the human heart” would be unbearably heavy if there were no way to soothe it. It won’t be fully relieved until we reach our home in Heaven. But prayer is the way the ache is soothed here on earth. God, in His goodness and grace, gave us a way to connect beyond the constraints of this world. That’s prayer.

I have always talked with God fairly easily. But I didn’t begin to understand the deep connection that happens in the spiritual realm when I pray until a few years ago. When I began to understand that my prayers allow my spirit to transcend the earthly and meet God in heavenly realms, it changed my perspective dramatically. And you know what? Brother Lawrence was right. The sweetest and most delightful life is the one that is continually conversing with the One who created it. It is only through connecting with God constantly that we are fully alive, that our spirits can breathe and expand and grow us into all God intends for us to be. Our prayers don’t change God. But praying continually, authentically–it changes us.

How has God changed you as you’ve met Him through prayer? We would love to continue this conversation with you. Please comment with your thoughts and questions!

–Laura

prayer

How Do We Respond to “Unanswered” Prayers?

Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.                   Philippians 4:6-7

Beau talked to us this weekend about how we handle our “unanswered” prayers. I assume that you, like me, can immediately think of more than one situation when God did not respond to the cries of your heart in the ways you thought He would-maybe how you thought He should? When we find ourselves in a moment like this, what do we do?

Beau spoke about our initial reactions. These are the immediate feelings and thoughts that occur when we don’t receive the answer that we hoped or thought we would. As Beau said, these are natural. There is no shame in an initial reaction–be it anger, disappointment, doubt, fear, etc… God gave us our feelings. And, as Ann Voskamp writes,

“Feelings are meant to be fully felt–and then fully surrendered to God”. 

Fully surrendered to God… That’s easier said than done, isn’t it? Especially when…

…our prayers for healing end in the death of someone we love

…we pray for a prodigal child and they seem to move further away from home

…our prayers for a baby end in a diagnosis of infertility

…God leads us away from a calling we believed He gave us

…our prayers for answers end in more questions

…we ask for stability and find ourselves unemployed

…we pray for our marriage and it still falls apart

We could add so much more to this list. We’ve all experienced the heartbreak of unanswered prayers–and if we haven’t, we can be assured that somewhere down the road, we will. Our understanding is limited. Our thoughts are not God’s thoughts, nor are our ways His ways. (Isaiah 55:8)  At some point on our journeys, our expectations collide with answers we didn’t expect, answers that feel more like unanswered prayers, and we find ourselves reacting out of our limited understanding. What happens next is up to us. Beau said it this way:

“If our initial reactions are left unattended, they will draw us away from God”.

Our initial reactions are natural. We react in our minds and our hearts without thinking about or choosing those reactions beforehand. But if we are not prepared to handle those reactions, if we don’t know what to do with them, we will discover that those initial reactions can lead to unhealthy responses. And the unhealthy responses, as Beau told us, can impact the way we see God, ourselves and others. They can also impact the way we pray from that point on.

“Initial reactions require intentional responses.”

Beau didn’t give us a list of what those intentional responses should look like. Instead, he took us on a journey through Scripture that reminded us who God is, who He says we are in Him, the way we are instructed to love others and the way God asks us to pray. Intentional responses are always based solidly on the Truth. Reactions are felt–responses are chosen.

In the end, Beau brought us back to Philippians.

Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.  

These verses are so familiar to me but–as only the Holy Spirit can facilitate–they came alive in a whole new way to me through Beau’s teaching. Hang with me here; I promise I will get to my (very mind-blowing) point shortly…

Beau reminded us that these verses begin with “In every situation“. Right away, I see this as a “daily”. An everyday discipline of bringing our prayers and requests before God that becomes a constant conversation that is eventually as natural as breathing. Then we read “with thanksgiving”. Beau said it this way: “A filter of thanksgiving colors everything accordingly”. Beautiful, right? I want to live a life that is colored, experienced, seen through the filter of thanksgiving. But, friends, that’s not the part that blew my mind…

After we are given instruction on how to pray, we read what happens as a result of praying God’s way.

…And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds…

It was when Beau broke down the word “guard” in this passage that I began to see these verses in a more brilliant light. The word in the original Greek [phroureō] means to protect, as you might imagine. But it also means to prevent hostile invasion. We’ll come back to that in a moment… The word is derived from two root words–and this is where it gets really exciting! The words are [pro], meaning before and [horaō], which means to see with the eyes, to see with the mind, to discern clearly. 

You guys. This. Is. Crazy!

So, let’s recap… If we come to God in every circumstance with all of our prayers and requests, and we do so with thanksgiving–then, the peace of God will protect our hearts and minds before we see, before we understand, before we discern clearly. Our hearts and minds can be protected from the hostile invasion of unhealthy responses before we even know how God will answer our prayers. If we begin by praying God’s way, we are guarded in this remarkable way. So that, when our prayers aren’t answered the way we hope, we can fully feel our feelings and then surrender them fully to God, with hearts and minds that were being protected from hostile invasion the moment we began to pray! This is huge. If we are protected before the answer comes, or doesn’t come–or doesn’t come the way we wanted it to–then we are prepared to respond in an intentional, healthy way, standing on the Truth, regardless of what the answer turns out to be. That is beautiful, empowering and so life-giving. Let that peace settle over you…

Beau reminded us, in regard to our “unanswered” prayers that God gives us what we would ask for if we knew what He knows. He concluded with this beautiful poem, written by Corrie Ten Boom:

“Life is but a Weaving” (the Tapestry Poem)

“My life is but a weaving
Between my God and me.
I cannot choose the colors
He weaveth steadily.
Oft’ times He weaveth sorrow;
And I in foolish pride
Forget He sees the upper
And I the underside.
Not ’til the loom is silent
And the shuttles cease to fly
Will God unroll the canvas
And reveal the reason why.
The dark threads are as needful
In the weaver’s skillful hand
As the threads of gold and silver
In the pattern He has planned
He knows, He loves, He cares;
Nothing this truth can dim.
He gives the very best to those
Who leave the choice to Him.”

Have you experienced unanswered prayers? Has God responded differently than you thought He should? How would it change your responses if you prayed the way Philippians 4:6-7 tells us to pray? I pray that as we ponder old truths and fresh insights, the Holy Spirit will move in each of us to empower us to choose healthy responses when we find ourselves tempted to question what we know to be true about God, ourselves and others. Blessings to you, friends.

–Laura

(Luanne is in a tropical paradise this week, so you have my thoughts alone–I would love to hear your thoughts and questions! Please interact with me through the comments section so we can continue this conversation! 🙂 )